WHEN YOU FEEL ANGRY

'Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.' James 1:19 NLT

The Bible gives us three keys to handling our anger the right way. Let's look at each one and see what we can learn:

1) 'Be quick to listen.' Don't react, and don't rush to judgment. Slow down and try to get the facts, then prayerfully and carefully consider how God wants you to respond. 

2) 'Slow to speak.' If you're unsure, or you don't know, just say so. There is an old Chinese proverb that says, 'It's better to say nothing and appear to be a fool than open your mouth and confirm it.' You need to be in control, or to look like you have all the answers, can come back to bite you. What you don't say, you won't have to explain or apologise for later. 

3) 'Slow to get angry.' Note, the Bible doesn't say that you should never get angry. It says you should get angry about the right things, in the right way, at the right time. Solomon says, 'Control your temper, for anger labels you a fool' (Ecclesiastes 7:9 NLT). That's why it's so important to deal with your hurts. An unhealed wound causes pain, which often manifests itself in anger. The trouble is, we carry our anger around with us and vent it on others. As a result, they distance themselves from us, or distrust us, or deny us the intimacy and closeness we desire with them. The Bible says, 'The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook transgression' (Proverbs 19:11 NKJV). 

Christlike character grows through exercising patience, love, and restraint.

MEDITATE ON THE SCRIPTURES

'I will meditate on Your precepts, and contemplate Your ways.' Psalm 119:15

If you want to grow spiritually. In fact, you will never outgrow your diet of Scripture. There is no substitute. There is no supplement. 

The poet T.S Eliot said, 'Everything we eat has some...effect upon us. It affects us during the process of assimilation and digestion; and I believe that exactly the same is true of anything we read.' We are what we read. But let's take that a step further. Reading without meditation is like eating without digesting. If you want to absorb the nutrients, you can't just read it; you have to chew on it. Meditation is the way we metabolise Scripture. That's how it gets into our spirit and our soul. The French writer Jacques Reda had a particular habit. He would walk the streets of Paris with the purpose of seeing one new thing every day. It was how he renewed his love for the city. We renew our love for God in a similar way. Our love grows as we see new dimensions of His personality, and His personality is predominantly revealed in the pages of the Bible. What if we approach God's Word the way Jacques Reda walked the streets of Paris? Here is the secret of spiritual growth: you can't merely read the Bible; you have to meditate on it. 

Reading provides breadth to our understanding, but meditation provides depth. If all we do is read Scripture, our understanding of God and our experience with Him is one-dimensional. The Bible is a kaleidoscope. Each time you turn it, another beautiful pattern of truth is revealed.

SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

'Our word to you does not waver between "Yes" and "No".' 2 Corinthians 1:18 NLT

Paul writes, 'Do you think I make my plans carelessly? Do you think I am like people of the world who say "Yes" when they really mean "No"? As surely as God is faithful, our word to you does not waver' (vv.17-18 NLT). 

Paul had learned to set boundaries on his relationships, and you must do the same. A wise man said, 'Never complain about what you permit. 'Unless you set boundaries, you have no right to complain about people who take advantage of you and waste your time. 'Jesus...does not waver between "Yes" and "No"...he always does what they say' (v 19 NLT). And as His follower, you must learn when it's appropriate to say yes and when it's appropriate to say no. When people back you into a corner, confront them promptly, privately, and personally. And if they won't listen, take someone with you. And if they won't listen to both of you, take it to the church leadership (see Mathew 18:15-17). Be clear about what you will and won't tolerate. In the words of the country song. 'You've got to stand for something or you'll for anything.' 

Get comfortable voicing your wishes and preferences without fear of rejection and alienation. Make this your prayer today: 'Lord, let me serve and give to others from a pure heart rather than a need for love and acceptance. On the authority of Your word, I command the spirit of fear that has prevented me from setting healthy boundaries to leave now. I place my trust in You. I will not fear what people can do to me (see Psalm 56:11), in Jesus' name, amen.'

CONTRARY WINDS

'The winds were contrary.' Acts 27:4 KJV

When you set out to do anything for God, the Enemy will make sure you encounter 'contrary winds'. In fact, if you're not sailing against the wind, chances are you're headed in the wrong direction! 

The Bible says Jesus was 'tempted of the devil'  (Mathew 4:1 KJV). Satan never let up, including the night before Jesus was crucified, when 'Satan entered into Judas...one of the twelve' (Luke 22:3 NLT). Reimar Schultze says, 'Wherever you go today, Satan will...try to get you at some street corner, at the office, or in the field. He will make you fall if you leave home without your spiritual armour on; if you leave your belt of truth...in the closet, your breastplate of righteousness...by the door, your gospel shoes under your bed, or if you leave your shield of faith, the sword of the spirit and the helmet of salvation behind you...If you say at daybreak, "I will pray whenever I get a chance today," you just gave away your victory. Before long, the wrong words will come out of your mouth; you will look at forbidden fruits and display an improper attitude. The most foolish thing (you) can do is to leave home unarmed and spiritually naked.

A fool says, "I have no time to attempt to repair the damage prayerlessness...produced...following Jesus is not a walk in the park...Every good thing in the kingdom...from Adam on has come to us through men and women who stuck it out when the going got tough. The biblical history of the church ends with (these victorious words)... and so we came to Rome" (Acts 28:14 NLT)

HUMBLE YOURSELF

'Those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.' Luke 18:14 NLT

Jesus said: 'Two men went to the Temple to pray. One was a Pharisee, and the other was a despised tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed this prayer: "I thank you, God, that I am not like other people - cheaters, sinners, adulterers. I'm certainly not like that tax collector! I fast twice a week, and I give you a tenth of my income." But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying, "O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner." 

I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For those who exalt themselves will be exalted' (vv.10-14 NLT). You can appear to be the most devout person in church yet have a heart filled with pride. And the worst part is that you don't know it. For example, when you take all the credit for things God enabled you to accomplish and acquire, that's pride. When you compare yourself with others, that's pride. When you think you can do the will of God without the power of God, that's pride. When you exclude people who don't fit into your peer group or social circle, that's pride. And it will cost you, because 'God opposes the proud but shows favour to the humble.' (James 4:6 NIVUK).

So if you want to walk in His favour today, then humble yourself before Him.

DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU'RE HERE?

 'He chose us.' Ephesians 1:4

When it comes to God's will for your life, He decides it, and you discover it. It's not something you can change, a topic for debate, or a plan you get to have a say in. The truth is, you can miss God's will and be miserable, or do things His way and experience 'glorious, inexpressible joy' (1 Peter 1:8 NLT). The choice is yours.

'But I don't know God's will for my life,' you say. Then pray this prayer: 'Father, I'm tired of going through life with no real purpose because it brings no glory to You. You created every living thing, including me, that they may bring You pleasure (see Revelation 4:11). I know that You have a specific job for me to do. Your Word says You formed me in the womb to be Your servant (see Isaiah 49:5). I'm getting lots of input from other people, but I need to know the path You have chosen for me. Help me to stop ignoring and minimising the gifts and talents You have invested in me, acting like they're of no significance. I know we are all called to serve, and I need Your help to discern who, where, when, and how I should serve. I want to do what You have destined me to do and not be sidetracked by wrong priorities, busywork, or other people's desires and demands.

At the end of my life, I want to be able to look back and say, like Jesus, "I brought glory to You here on earth by doing everything You told me to" (see John 17:4). In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

FINDING COMMON GROUNDS

'I try to find common ground with everyone.' 1 Corinthians 9:22 NLT

To influence someone, you must first connect with them. And to do that, you must look for common ground. Paul writes, 'I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some.' 

In The Message, Eugene Peterson paraphrases Paul's words: 'Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists, the defeated, the demoralised - whoever. I didn't take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ - but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I've become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn't just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!' (vv 19-23 MSG). Note the words 'I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view'. When it came to preaching the truth, Paul wouldn't yield an inch. But when it came to reaching and influencing people for Christ, he tried to remove every roadblock between them and Christ. And you must be willing to do the same. 

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. That's why you must approach them heart-first, not headfirst. Before someone can receive the truth you have to share, they must be convinced that you love and care for them. And that means finding common ground.